Parenting together but apart

If you divorce or separate, you do still continue to be parents and will need to resolve the future arrangements for your children.   It is essential to make sure that the process of divorce or separation does not prevent you from working together as parents to achieve what is best for your children.  Experience suggests that children thrive when their parents and relations are able to  cooperate with each other.    Although at times it may be difficult, a constructive approach, putting the interest of the children first, will lay the best foundations for your children.

Making decisions about the future arrangements for your children is something that you  can achieve by using the mediation or collaborative law process. You may also wish to have the benefit of practical and effective legal advice to support and guide you at this time.

Many parents going through separation or divorce do however need information and support outside of the scope of the legal process. They may seek guidance on how to actually tell their children they are divorcing,  on managing their children’s feelings as well as their own and help with how they can function as parents, whilst no longer being a couple.

To help parents access practical and straightforward guidance Resolution has set up a Parent Advice Centre on its website –

Here you will find helpful information and guidance about post-separating parenting and details about the Parenting After Parting workshops that are available, including dates and times.  These workshops give parents the opportunity to hear from a presenter trained by Resolution.  You will also find other resources such as  details of useful publications or other websites.

You can also read, or download, a booklet written by the parenting expert Christina McGhee on behalf of Resolution: Separation and Divorce -  Helping parents to help children which deals with

  • managing the negative impact of divorce for Children
  • talking to your children about your divorce
  • tips for managing your relationship with your ex-spouse or ex-partner.

Resolution is the leading association of family lawyers in England and Wales.  Its members aim to resolve issues in a constructive manner designed to preserve a person’s dignity and to encourage agreements.  Kim Finnis is a Resolution accredited specialist.  If you would like legal advice about the arrangements for your children on divorce or separation you can contact Kim on:  01483 539100.

The practice of Kim Finnis, Solicitor is now permanently closed. If you would like to instruct Kim Finnis, please contact her at KJ Smith Solicitors, Cross Keys, 18 Wycombe End, Beaconsfield, HP9 1NB. Tel : 01494 629000. Email :